She lay back on the bed and stared at the meagre blue sky  visible between the roofs of the buildings around. The white clouds passed by, twisting into different shapes as they went. A horse turned into an apple and the apple into fire. Then an airplane flew by, scattering the fire, in its haste to land at the airport nearby. Other clouds took its place, floating by in an everlasting tango.

She turned her head to watch his sleeping form. His brown hair tousled and sticking up every which way brought a smile to her face. She reached out to touch the salt and pepper scruff on his chin. She quite liked the sandpaper feel of it. She ran her hand up his face,  through the dusting of freckles on his cheeks, to his crow’s feet, to his forehead wrinkles. She rested her hand on his forehead and really looked at him. He was almost never this peaceful. He was always moving, twitching really, pattering his feet along a tune in his head, doing one thing or the other. Even when sleeping, he twisted and turned so much so that it was nearly impossible for her to get any sleep until she got used to it.

She wasn’t quite sure how all this came to be. He was just an idea in her head for the longest time. Even in the cynical character that she projected for everyone, in some inner recess of her mind, she fervently wished and patiently waited for someone like him to  come along. And when he did, it threw her for a loop. Everyone talks about falling in love, but staying in love is a completely different beast. There was no rule book, no guidelines. You were left to wander without a map.

She had built these walls in her mind over the years. They were partly to protect her from hurt, and were partly born out of shyness. The tallest and strongest wall was the one she built between who she actually is and what she called her public face. That wall never came down in front of anyone, not even her closest friends. He was patient, he was so very patient. A reasonable man would have run for the hills. But he stayed, navigating through her tantrums and insecurities and general unsociability, tearing down that wall brick by brick, piece by piece.

As her mind was wandering on these musings, the object of these mental meanderings opened his eyes. They were azure as the sky, deep and steady even when languid. They softened as he looked at her, crinkling at the corners in a half smile. She leaned over and pressed her lips to his forehead. His smile widened. He pulled her to him, burying his face in her hair. She laid her head on the crook of his neck and inhaled his scent. As his arms tightened around her, she felt truly safe.

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Sometimes

I want to write an ode,

To your steel blue eyes

Those clear spots of calm

In an ocean storm.

Azure as the sky

Tender as a flower

Those gorgeous orbs

Take my breath away.

Open them, my love,

Gaze at me as you do,

Drown me in their depths,

Hold me in their embrace,

As long as this moment lasts.

Flying with a star

A star watches me, day in and day out

Keenly measuring my thoughts

My desires and emotions…

When it speaks to me,

It speaks of a past

It speaks of a future,

So fantastic,

So irreversibly intertwined,

It speaks of all that I could be,

If I were free of my shell.

 

“I’ll show you the Universe

On a scale you’ve never seen,

I’ll take you past several moons,

Past a hundred earths so blue,

Past yellow suns so new…

Come, ride with me,

Let’s scatter your atoms

All through the cosmos,

You’ll be moonlight and stardust

You’ll be the start and end of all.

Come, dive into my primordial soup,

Into scorching plasma and soothing winds

Melt your thoughts away one by one

Until all that is left is you, pure and simple.”

 

 

 

 

Purple dreams

I dream in purple sometimes,

It’s my happy colour

It swirls and twirls in my brain

And lulls me back to sleep.

Last night I was a purple unicorn

My horn was sweet and spice

My bed smelled of lavender

My breath was warm and summer-like.

I stepped off into a purple sea

My tail grew and so did I

I’m a Grecian sea horse now,

I can taste the purple waves.

Then I saw the edge of time

Where the purple sky met the sea

My wings twitched and jerked

I hid among the purple clouds.

 

 

It was the first day of Spring,

I took off my shoes and toed the grass

Morning dew still within

Tickled my toes and calmed my soul.

A lonely yellow flower

Poked its head through the ground,

I patted it and murmured,

‘Welcome back, dear old friend’ !

Children played on the swings,

Happy families all around

I looked about and met your eye

A chord twanged in my heart.

The wind was playing with your hair,

You smiled and I smiled back

In your bright blue eyes,

I saw an ocean storm swell.

Your thoughts wove a canvas

Flared up my daydreams and nights

Your touch like an ember

That lit a fire under my skin.

This seems like a moment of truth,

Is it a passing fancy,

Or dare I say the word,

‘Love’ in all its fury ?

Where do we go from here,

To the pastures of everlasting joy,

To love and to keep forever

Or the glass case of broken dreams

To forget and be forgotten…

 

 

 

 

She spent every summer vacation at her great aunt’s place in the countryside, a respite from the city and it’s pervasive loneliness. There, among the mango trees and the paddy fields, she felt truly alive. There were other children to play with, and oodles of open ground just to laze around in. The sky was blue all day everyday, the sun bright and the landscape inviting.

That was the first time ever they had done anything wayward, so to speak. It wasn’t exactly a risky endeavour, since they weren’t even leaving the property. But it felt exhilarating just the same, the thrill of doing something forbidden no matter how tame it was. They stole away at night after the grown ups were asleep, and walked to the stream past the fields. The night was a little chilly, though not unusually so. The strips dividing the fields were so narrow that they had to walk in a single file, like ants treading a line, while the moonlight streamed over them in a silvery cascade. They walked by the palm trees, past  the small fishing pond in the centre and beyond the line of trees at the edge whose names she did not know.

Someone had swiped a bottle of whiskey from her uncle’s bar. They passed it around, each taking a swallow, shuddering and handing off the offending item to the next person. She gently lowered herself on to the grass and stared at the pinpricks in the inky sky. She could feel the alcohol traversing her body, all the way to her bones.  Someone had started singing, in a voice that should never be raised in song. The stream flowed on and on, its melody uninterrupted and serene.

Moment by moment

Minute by minute

You and I Disappear

Into the vast well of time.

All that was,

All that is,

All that will be

Mere mirages of the mind.

Embrace what is,

Enjoy while it lasts

For life and love and joy

Are fleeting at best.

There was a boy

Who loved too soon,

With a kind heart

And an easy smile.

There was a girl

Who guarded her heart,

With high flying dreams

And twinkling brown eyes.

There was a love

That never took off

Like a Song unsung,

Like a tale untold.

When all is said and done,

There is a Glimmer of light,

A flicker of hope

At the end of each deep dark tunnel

That edges us on.

Oft times  so small

So easily missed,

So easily ignored,

But there it remains.

My life was a tiny boat

Upon a sea at low tide,

Nodding and bobbing

Among friendly waves…

Then you came along,

And Disrupted what I’d carefully built.

For a while, all was well,

The waves were calm and placid

My boat kept bobbing on,

In search of new horizons,

Sandy shores and lovely people.

One day, there was a wave

That came up all at once

Threw my little boat

Flat out on some rocks.

It blew leaks,

Its paint blistered,

It broke in half,

It sank to the bottom.